A crappy day...

Today I woke up and rushed the kids to get ready so that I could get to Tyler's doctor appointment by 8:30. I hate going to the doctor. It is one of my least favorite things to do. Tyler was meeting with a developmental specialist who has an amazing reputation at Riley Children's Hospital. We have seen her once before and I truly think she is a brilliant woman. Despite how well we were treated, I still just felt sick to my stomach as I left the appointment. We went though all of Tyler's delays and where he needs extra help and ALL the many things that I should be doing better as a parent. She was asking me to do things that I feel are truly impossible while I am trying to raise two other kids and hold down the fort and everything else. Two of the big things we talked about are his feeding and his attention seeking (biting) behavior. I just felt even more stressed after the appointment and felt like I am a D+ parent.
After those three hours to start my morning off, I felt crappy the whole day. But then....a miracle occurred. It was a huge miracle that could only come through God. Dave was playing with Tyler up in his room when he shouted for me to come up. He said, "Kristine, you won't believe it, but Tyler just started clapping!" Just hours before at the Dr. appointment, Dr. Bull asked me if he could clap yet. I said, "No, we have been working on it for the last 6 months. He won't do anything where he needs to bring both hands together at his mid line. He won't sign "more", and he won't clap." She said, "Well, don't give up because he is a smart kid and there is no reason why he can't do it. Keep working with him." That is no coincidence to me that on the very day when I felt like everything I try (and his 4 therapists try) to work on is not getting results, that Tyler decided to give us his very first clap. It was the cutest thing to watch. Bringing his hands together at the same time and clapping them does not look easy for him. He was concentrating very hard and I could see a look of purpose and determination as well as looking alittle unsure of himself as he made those first claps. I was told from the beginning that the little milestones with Tyler will be a much bigger deal than my other kids, and boy is that true. Tonight as he was clapping again and again, I felt so much joy to watch him do something so basic, something I never cared about one bit with Josh or Maddie.
I do believe that God wanted to give me something to smile about tonight. It was truly a precious sight to behold. Thank you Tyler for giving me a gift one week before your second birthday.